


Brood

by JaciSerigala



Series: ErzaJane Drabbles [6]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Ambiguous Relationship, Drabble, F/F, Friendship, erzajanetop10
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-30 21:17:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17231357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaciSerigala/pseuds/JaciSerigala
Summary: (n.) think deeply about something that makes one unhappy, angry, or worried.





	Brood

**Author's Note:**

  * For [icemakestars](https://archiveofourown.org/users/icemakestars/gifts).



Scarlet streaked across the sky like blood across a battlefield, or a rose garden amidst a valley of white lilies, it stood bold and beautiful and unrelenting, though her eyes barely took in the gorgeous colour. She saw it enough whenever she looked in the mirror to be desensitized to the colour that so many others found so appealing. It was such a striking thing about her, the first thing anyone ever saw when they glanced in her direction was the waterfall of red that swung out behind her as she strode forward in life, though those few who found beauty in her hair time and time again still gave her halter, even that was losing some of its magic.

With Jellal now behind bars, Erza wasn’t sure what to think. So much had happened so recently, that she couldn’t quite comprehend it all, and it would take another few sessions of brooding to truly come to terms with such a malleable year. She gazed across the city, as her skirt tried to dance to the wind with her hair, but not quite reaching as far as her longer hair could, as it blew in her face. Many times, she had considered chopping it off, as it constantly got in the way and was generally a hinderance in battle, but she never did. Either because she was so busy as an s-class wizard, or because her feminine side complained whenever she considered cutting her hair.

“You can do it if you want to.” A voice offered from behind her, though she didn’t need to turn around to know who it was. Who else would it be, but the latest person who had found seemingly endless admiration for her hair.

“Hmm…” She hummed non-committedly, rubbing a few strands between her fingers. It probably did need a wash and a cut. Silence stretched on once again, Erza’s thoughts were a mess, but she wasn’t sure if she could completely blame the grief that came with Jellal’s detainment.

“Dime for your thoughts?” Mira asked, as she slipped beneath the safety bars of the balcony to sit next to the brooding woman, watching the sunset with her.

“Mmm…” She shrugged, her busy mind barely registering the words, she left the gap between her and the pretty barmaid. “I just…”

“Take your time.” Mira whispered, not pushing or asking anything from Erza, her gentle nature guiding her every action, glance, breath, word. She was such a tender person, if she ever did take on a lover, could she be any gentler with them, Erza mused.

“I just found him again.” She murmured, the words spilling out of her with no shape or structure, each utterance were messy, a perfect reflection of her mind. “But… he’s not the hero that I remember from back then. But he’s not the villain that I remember either. I… I don’t know him anymore, he’s a stranger, and I…

“I… I think I’m tired of waiting.”

“There’s nothing wrong with that.” Mira replied after a couple moments.

“But… it feels wrong…” She pressed on. There was very little emotion in her voice, as that had all been expended a few days ago when she sobbed to the setting sun. “He used to be my world, and now… now he needs me more than ever. He’s been my dream for so long, and now that he’s back… sort of… he’s just… I don’t… I feel like I should want to help him after all he did for me when I was younger, but I’m just so tired… and now that’s he’s practically a stranger… he’s not the knight in shining armour of my childhood. He’s someone else entirely. The Jellal I knew is gone. I see that now, and I don’t want to wait for him anymore.”

“There isn’t anything wrong with feeling that way.” Mira whispered.

“Then why do I feel guilty?”

“Because you’re a compassionate person who throws herself into every friendship she makes. You’re so selfless, and you’ve paid forward his kindness a dozen times over.” Reaching out, Mira brushed a finger down the redhead’s arm, the touch so gentle that it could’ve been accident. Though Erza wasn’t fooled.

“But I-”

“But it’s okay to walk away from someone who isn’t good for you anymore.” She interrupted gently.

“But I’m the only one he remembers, I feel like I’m the only one he has. I feel… stuck…” Erza frowned, shifting slightly closer to her friend as she was dredged out of her thoughts, and closer to Mira.

“You don’t have to decide everything just yet, he’s gone away for a while, so you have time to decide who you want to be for him.” Mira offered. “And if you decide that you want to leave the bridge burnt, then that’s that, and you won’t owe him anything else. It’s like you said, he’s not the boy you knew, but at some point you have to take care of yourself rather than him.”

“I wish this was easier.” The redhead groaned, as she slumped over, leaning her head against Mira’s shoulder, as she absentmindedly watched the day’s light fall behind the horizon.

“It’s not your emotions job to make sense.” Mira reasoned, as she brought up a hand to smooth the scarlet locks between her delicately placed fingers. “All you can do is take this as it comes, but you don’t have to do it alone.”

 

“You’d look beautiful either way.” She whispered into the cool evening, massaging the vermillion hair, slowly, methodically, as her endless admiration and capacity to love guided Erza to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> This was made for the ErzaJane Top 10 Project.


End file.
